Week Of Hell

My apologies if I have not posted anything in two weeks. Usually I am so exhausted from working all week that I don’t have the moxie or the inspiration to post anything. Today is no different, but a lot has happened in the past two weeks, and I would like to get it off my chest.

Work has been driving me crazy all week. This past Wednesday and Thursday, I felt like my mind was ready to snap. I was physically and mentally exhausted. I needed a break. But, due to the job constantly being shorthanded, it has been nothing but work, work, work! My head was hurting. I no longer felt human. The spirits knew I was in trouble, and they did their best to quell the hurtful thoughts in my mind.

I thought I would meditate using the selenite wands I purchased a month ago. I held one in each hand whilst I was listening to binaural beats. Instantly, I was in my happy place. Trees swaying in the breeze, clear blue sky, the sun was shining, soft green grass, and a waterfall in the distance. But I was crying. I didn’t want to live. The spirits wanted to know why was I so upset. Even they could not console me. But soon after, I drifted off to an unknown place. I would have stayed there longer, but the phone beeped because of an incoming text message. Ugh!! Next time, I’ll set it for do not disturb.

Even though I came out of the mediation rather abruptly, I was feeling better. My head was not hurting so much. I guess the wands did their job. I was able to sleep that night. But the healing process takes a few days. I was still feeling numb on Friday because of more changes at work, and I needed to process the information, but I was on the road to recovery. Now I listen to music whenever I am at work. I created a few playlists on Spotify, and it keeps my mind from completely shutting down. I’m even considering a paid subscription so I don’t have to deal with the ad breaks, and I’ll get unlimited skips.

So next week I’ll be covering yet another route, AND, I have to use his bus instead of mine, which really irritates me. The irony is that the bus I’ll be using is a 2019 model, which accelerates effortlessly, is quieter, has a better ride, and a working CD player as opposed to my raspy, rough riding 2012 model with a non functioning CD player. But I am accustomed to it, and I don’t complain. I’ll be on this route for a week, then who knows what hell I’ll be in for the week after. I just want my own route. I’m tired of playing the bus switching game, and I hate driving someone else’s bus.

The one bright spot with everything that is going on is the girlfriend. I love her so much. I am dying to go see her, but I need the enhanced license to fly. I made an appointment with DMV for next month. It annoys me this its taking me so long just to go Florida. It would be my first trip out of state since I went to Foxwoods in CT a few years ago. That was no big deal. Just had to take the bus and a ferry across the Sound. From what I have seen so far about air travel, I may consider taking Amtrak and spending the $400 odd dollars for a roomette for privacy. There is no way I am riding overnight in coach. The noise and lack of privacy would be bad for my anxieties.

I’m waiting on the arrival of a rose quartz crystal and a smokey quartz crystal. I had them blessed by pagan friends, and they will help me in times of stress and anxiety. I’m the only one that can touch them. No one else. I will keep them in my new dragon trinket box, which I absolutely love. I want to give one to the girlfriend for Yule. I purchased this one on Amazon.

The trinket box came in handy when I was watching American Horror Story: Apocalypse. There are numerous scenes of Satanic rituals, including Satanic worship, and I was feeling uncomfortable. I was stroking the dragon on the trinket box cover to keep me grounded. Otherwise, there would have been no way for me to sit through that. I was ready to turn off the TV! Makes me glad that I have a connection to dragons.

So yeah, a lot has been going on here. But at least Halloween is coming. Wish I could spend it with the girlfriend in person. Hopefully I can do it next year. I haven’t forgotten about the tee shirts. I’m still thinking about offering them, but I want to do it the right way, and get it set up right to make it easy for me. Now that its getting cold, I want to offer hoodies, sweaters, and other products. Its just my anxieties that are in the way. Once I get past it, I’ll be able to go forth and achieve my ambitions.

Thank you for reading my post. Hopefully I’ll have another post in a week. If not, then fear not. It might be because I’m tired. But I love all my followers, and I wish to keep you updated. Remember to Be Your Greatest Version.